salma sitaray

We are sitting at the back. The booth at the very end. In Purple Haze.

Lying on the ground, The stars smile down while the lark cries And I hear nothing more, I see the entire, I see it all I feel all the more And I find it abysmal The soft downy meadow Provides me with a comfort hitherto unknown And from beneath the willow, the moon casts a shadow. And I hear nothing more, I see the entire, I see it all I feel all the more And I find it abysmal The crickets sing with the evening breeze And the fireflies do their evening dance I lay at ease, And realize myself to be just a chance And I hear nothing more, I see the entire, I see it all I feel all the more And I find it abysmal The twilit sky and its infinite reach Like a fabric of breathtaking beauty, studded with jewels Seems to reach out breach The barriers of my mind and soul And I hear nothing more, I see the entire, I see it all I feel all the more And I find it abysmal

Views expressed below are personal, and only apply to myself. This post is about how I, personally, deal with this aspect of parenthood. In no way do I intend to undermine/downplay the work/love and devotion of our parents, who are the only reason why I can think critically and differently and who I feel did do (and still do) all they can for us, without expecting anything in return. One of the things that I rediscovered when we became parents was the world of quotes/scriptures/Facebook scamps etc exalting how parents were the epitome of humanity, and how each and every happening in one's life needed to be attributed to their parents' great work either directly (in raising them and providing them with the necessities of life) or indirectly (praying and spiritual development). My timelines are filled with heart wrenching pictures of random old people, superimposed with Urdu poetry praising how mothers who fed and raised their children only ask for a small gesture of blessi...

No, I am not talking about Aids or HIV which sadly enough have enough social stigma attached with them anyways... I am talking about our desi take on health conditions Usually when  knowledge gains popularity, societies evolve and people's lives and social skills are bettered and improved, but NOT in Pakistan. In Pakistan, the exact opposite happens I've noticed how, as morning shows have been trying to 'save' the nation by including a 'health panel' amid all the craziness that passes off as a morning show, the ladies who lap up their content have also started commenting and criticizing the local eating and lifestyle habits. At a party recently, due to the layer of roghan floating on the Nihari , the dinner table broke out in a heated discussion by a group of aunties of how 'horrible' our eating habits are and how 'fat people are simply so lazy and should do something about themselves' "Have you seen how XYZ eats? She can eat her...

So after much contemplating, I've realized the best way forward is maybe to shift my focus to other things/topics to blog about.  It's not that I have run out of good memories to write about, it's just that the current times are so 'interesting' I'm tempted to write more about them instead. Keep an eye out for a variety of other topics I'll cover... ------------------------------ The text up there? I typed that exactly 1 year ago which makes me wonder that exactly is it with October?? I mean why is it that after October gives me these shifts in paradigms?? ... So picking up from where I left i'm going to now try and blog more frequently. I'll also be writing about why I disappeared for more than a year as well as a lot of other topics that I've been meaning to write about for quite some time now...

Without being too disrespectful (or going in too much depth) I'll confess something to here: I am a BIG believer in the concept of karma i.e. the concept of what you do is what is returned to you, either here or in the afterlife. It forms the very BASIS of our existence, in terms of our religion too. Do good, so you shall have good, here or in the afterlife. As you sow, so shall you reap جیسا بوا ویسا کاٹا What goes around, comes around etc. etc. جیسے کرنی ویسے بھرنی What I fail to understand is why are we so eager to pin mis-happenings on some external hand, or on to an azaab (punishment) of the divine, while blissfully living life breaking every possible rule... I am talking about rules and actions that define us as a human. The most simple, basic definition: An entity who thinks, strives to be good, do good, and tries not to harm others That is how I define us humans. Why is it that then, we've managed to give ourselves a free pass to do whatever we l...